August 27, 2010

draft #1

Title : Parenthink

I was brought up with a lot of wisdom from my parents. One thing they tried to engrave into me is that there is a vast difference between needs and wants. This is what has been taught for years. Fulfil your needs, then if it is possible, go and get some wants which are not too selfish. Work hard to put the meal on the table, and if you are lucky, you may get some desserts. Spend the weekend or holiday to visit the elders, and if you are lucky enough, you might be brought to the park.

My dad, the sole bread-winner for the family who has worked hard all his life to provide for a wife and five children, is now a bit old (is that the right word? hehe..). He has cars and house to pay, he is close to retirement, his children are still so dependent on him, and he is at the stage where his needs are many and he can hardly look at some wants. Most of the needs are not his, in fact. He joked by saying, "During the time I can afford for a steak, I don't have the teeth to eat it."

Last two months, I demanded quite a lot of things from dad and so he said, "Other things can wait, right? I need to pay your fees first." And after all the fees for my coming semester had been paid, I felt guilty to demand from him anything. The fees cost a lot more than my own computer -- which is a good thing, I supposed, because it will remind me how much more valuable my education is, as compared to any other material belongings. (I finally see thing like a mature human does ^.^)

Dad really has weird style to rule his children. Okay, I am a CDL holder -- I have to mention this so that you know how silly my situation is. I am just allowed to drive on my own within 5km radius from the house. Going anywhere outside the range, dad must be right inside the car to supervise my skills. I need to emphasize here, I have a competent driving license. Not L or P, get it? But, CDL means nothing more than a pass to go to the nearest convenience store, and of course, to send and pick up my brother from school. Oh, come on dad, why did you send me to the driving school in the first place, when you yourself want to be my lifetime instructor?

Hanging out with mom and dad means we could never split up to hit different spots. Dad wants us to be right under his nose like the baby chicken following their mom. Dad, as well as the boys, would be attracted to stuffs which are totally ... boring! When he stopped at the sports or car gadgets department, he would take like a century to look around, comparing this and that. But when it was our turn to be impressed and to have a look, he would just walk as fast as humanly possible. Okay, this could be a good thing too -- because we can quickly grab the stuff without considering the price and sneak it into the trolley when we catch up with dad's convoy later. Next thing he knew, he would have to pay for the out-of-nowhere-item at the counter.

One thing about dad is, he can be seriously angry at you when he catch you messing up. But he cools down real quick. He can scold at your face until you feel like it is the end of the world, or, if the world is not going to end there, you will swear that kind of thing will not happen again under the hot or cold weather, be it night or days. Then, after a few minutes, you can really talk to him like nothing has happened because he treats you all the same, which will make you feel like you were just hallucinating, nothing has actually happened. May be, except for the fact that you cannot pretend nothing has happened because you will be all stuttering and keep on showing guilty face.

Mom. She is practically paying a particular attention towards honesty. You have to be hundred percent transparent to your parents. No double meaning, no inaccurate information, and no hidden agenda. Everything has to be very exact and precise. Whatever you want to do, you have to go through your parents first. If they say "No" then it really means 'No'. And if they say "No negotiation" then it means 'No negotiation and stop making that face because I won't change my decision no matter what'. So, ask parents' permission first then obey their decision. Sometimes, you know you will risk the chance when you ask. But, ask anyway. I bet you cannot afford having trust issues with your parents.

For mom, asking permission from the parents is not something you can take so lightly. When you met mom and she asked, "Did your parents know you come here?". That would be a tricky question (I tell you the trick). So, think first before you respond to the question (but try not to sound hesitate). Because tricky question seems so easy at first and it traps you in the middle. And finally, you will blame yourself for being such a moron. And, yeah I know, you are not staying at home (we live on-campus, right?). But still it is so necessary for the parents to control your whereabouts -- according to mom. 

I thought mom's days getting involved in school were over. She used to be one of those parents who came in to help out in the classroom. But that all changed after we moved -- she only showed up at school during the days which parents are requested to come, you know, like PTA meeting or when the teachers want to hand in the report card and all that. But she totally proved that I was wrong. Last week, she went to my brother's school just to make a suggestion to the homeroom teacher (homeroom teacher sounds so cool!) on how to make sure the kids do not misplace their stuffs. Okay, that was really funny!.

And this morning, she called the office of my sister's school and left a message for my sister not to forget to call home [read: mom] during recess. Only because my sister did not call home for three days now. Okay, that was even more funny! My sister called and she claimed, it was seriously embarrassing. She was in the midst of a lesson and suddenly the clerk came announcing to the whole class, "Nabihah, your mom called and she said don't forget to call her during recess." And the whole class laughed at her. Yeah, luckily the clerk did not announce it through the PA system.

Oh, and Monday after the school holiday, mom called my other sister's Geography teacher telling her, "Nafiisah belum bind lagi folio Geography dia." Huh. So funny, right? Why did she feel so accountable when my sister did not finish the homework? I think this sister of mine is a bit spoilt. And she is easily influenced by friends, which, it is a bit harder for mom to control her. Otherwise, she is quite a nice and cute girl. If I have the power to change her, or, if she wants to listen to what I am going to say, I would like her to get rid of her current friends (which is the most impossible thing to happen). 

I showed mom pictures of a cousin using the other cousin's Facebook account. And we kept stalking from one cousin to another. Looking at the pictures of this cousin with her boyfriend and the other cousin with his girlfriend and so on. Suddenly, she said, "Where's yours? Why do you keep showing other people's pictures? Not yours? I want to see yours." Then, we kept on assuring her that we do not have one. But she could not take our words.

What do you want to hide from me?
Nothing. Really. We don't have one.
Don't lie. Every person at your age has this, right?
Mom, you know what. Looking for a single person with no Facebook account, is like looking for your another pair of sock, missing in a laundry room as big as Texas City. It's really a world's treasure. And have it in your home. You are supposed to be proud!
... (Seemed a bit more convinced)

However, I still do not understand how do my parents work. I mean, as a parent. Dad is always the one who decides. Once he has finalized the decision, no one can object. He will give you all the pressure to follow what he said. Yeah, of course it is stressful. But, once you follow what he said, he will put no more pressure on you. Which is the reason why I chose not the change to the other programme. I cannot bear the consequences of him pressuring me for four years, and having unsettled feeling every time we meet. So aisyah, let's just do this for the sake of mom and dad. (Takpe, dapat pahala kan?)

End of draft #1.
-left unconcluded-
-was written during the holiday-

You will be seeing this kind of post coming every now and then because I possess quite a lot of them in store. I have to dispense them before the end of the shelf life. Or else it will be returned to the manufacturer to do all the rechecking. And there you go, they will be disposed. (I am talking pharm prac)

People, I have been diagnosed with severe homesickness.

Patient : 
aisyah (21 y/0)

Tablet dopamine 50mg
sig. 1 t.i.d x 7

I miss my family a lot. We have not met for two months now. Mom and dad always call me. Almost everyday, in fact. And so do my sisters. They miss me a lot too (haha.. perasan tak?). I finally make this. Not going home at all for two months. Bravo to myself!

Yesterday was regarded as the last day of the week (yeah, because today is holiday). It was quite disastrous. People around me were studying for the quizzes like they were going to sit for SPM. Or, may be a lot harder. Staying up late is not my nature. But, as I am trying to adapt, I tried to do that. Due to the reason I am deprived from having sufficient sleep, which leads to the weakening of the immune system. (I am talking physio)

I am so great I am jealous of myself ^.^


Coming BIG events :

(1). 28th August
LM 2020 -- Exam

(2). 30th August
PHM 1143 -- Quiz 2
(Most probably)

(3). 1st September
PHM 1153 -- Quiz 2

(4). 3rd September
PHM 1123 -- Quiz 2
PHM 1133 -- Quiz 2

(5). 4th September
Voila! I am going home. Finally. :)
(Yeah, going home is one of the biggest events)

Note to self :

p/s 1 : 
It is too early to wish happy holiday or happy hari raya. So, happy staying up late lagi kawan2 Rx9 :) Lepas habis quiz boleh balik rumah ye. Hehe. 

p/s 2 :
Good luck for those who will be sitting for the mini test, end of block exam, mid semester exam, and ... quiz. Of course. 

p/s 3 :
Oh, lupa pulak. Selamat berpuasa :)


  1. Oh I have lot to say. Tapi takot jd personal pula :D hoho
    I think, many would kill juz to have a family like yours, tau.
    AND when your mam called Nabihah's school god hahha that cracked me up! :^) Just remind me to come here on bad days, this suuuure put things back together. AND I'm going home 0n Sept 4 too! Sorang ke Utara sorang ke Selatan. Adei.
    Keep posting the drafts. <3

  2. to GalaxyDefender :

    Email me. Email me. I am so curious what have you got to say. :)
    Hehe. I know. I know. You've told that a lot of times. Balik la rumah kite. Cakap nak jadi anak angkat. Hehe.
    Yeah, my mom is that ... urm, what do you call it? Enthusiastic? Haha.
    Oowh yeke. Tak sabar kan nak balik? Possible tak kite bertembung tengah jalan?

  3. dopamine 50mg bnyk sngt tu
    nnt patient overdose plk
    5mg should b ok =)

    jom stdy pharm prac same2

    peace (",)

  4. to senior :

    Oh, okay2.. :)
    Now, I wonder does it really exist in tablet form?
    I've checked with the MIMS. MIMS said dopamine is parenteral.
    Camne nak study pharm prac? Bace lecture notes je okay tak? <- pemalas kan? -.-"


. snape's potion class : in memories . :'(

. dumbledore's army .